Cathy Bray

Passionate Pursuit...A Love Story

"Stay alive! I will find you; no matter how long it takes; no matter how far!" These words are from a scene in James Fennimore Cooper's epic love story, The Last of The Mohicans. Hawkeye, the rugged frontiersman adopted by the Mohicans, passionately pleads with his British aristocratic love, Cora Munro, as they separate from each other in an effort to ward off impending danger. Hawkeye's impassioned cry characterizes my life's journey to find love and God's passionate pursuit to provide it.

As a seven-year-old child, I came to realize that God loved me and wanted me to have a relationship with him through His Son, Jesus. I made a decision to have such a relationship, but there was no guidance or growth in my life. My home was tempestuously dysfunctional. Events and behaviors that took place in my house sent me "looking for love in all the wrong places". God was searching for me, but I moved farther and farther away from Him. He tried to show me how much he loved me, but I could not see it. As a teenager, I struggled with issues of guilt and shame and with making wise decisions for my life. God kept pursuing me, but I still resisted His love.

Out of desperation when I was 21 years old, I turned to God and tried to live a life that included Him. Destructive behaviors continued, but the Spirit of God miraculously was able to have an effect upon my life. I continued to have spiritual failures, but God never stopped loving me. He wanted me for His own and would stop at nothing to apprehend my heart! He had a plan for me, and He had some very special work for me to do because of my pain and brokenness. As the years went by, He kept on loving me, helping me, and healing me. I began to see that Christ died for me, so that I could live for Him. Really live for Him! Not only could I know real love and have real peace on earth, I could also spend eternity with God in heaven when I die. No matter how long it took and no matter how far He had to go, God never stopped loving me, and passionately pursuing me for His own.

Jesus is my Savior and my Lord, and I am a new creation in Christ!!! What a story! A love story that the God of the universe, my heavenly Father, penned and personally orchestrated just for me!!